Rule #1 – Stand up straight with your shoulders back.
In his book 12 Rules for Life, Jordan Peterson lays out a case for each rule that includes information and evidence from culture, religion, science, mythology, history, and psychology.
This series is designed as a way to discuss the rules and provide ideas about applying them to your life.
Tip: If you’re planning on using the worksheets that are provided with each podcast/rule start a journal/notebook where you can collect the worksheets and do the work.
For this first discussion, I am joined by my son London. At 25, he’s got a slightly different perspective on the world than I do.
Please enjoy the video or podcast and then read on and/or print the worksheet to start applying Rule #1 – Stand up straight with your shoulders back – to your life today.
This rule is both physical and metaphorical.
How can you apply the rule to your life?
Evaluate your physical stature.
Are you standing up with your shoulders back or hunched over, with your eyes down?
Do you keep your chin up and eyes forward when you walk down the street? Are you able to make eye contact and perhaps smile at the people walking toward you?
When you have an interaction with another person either known or unknown are you conscious of your body language?
How you present yourself determines how you will be perceived and received. It also determines where you might be placed in the social hierarchy. Whether you admit it openly or not, your brain keeps track of where you are in the hierarchy. Standing up with your shoulders back might help to elevate your social status.
Take up some space
Make your mind feel more powerful by striking a power pose before presenting in a meeting or having a conversation. Harvard psychologist Amy Cuddy describes power poses as expansive open stances where you take up a lot of space and hold your arms and legs away from your body. When you expand your body, Cuddy says, “your mind starts to feel more confident and powerful — it starts to see those challenging situations not as threats but as opportunities.”
Get BIG! – Give yourself a confidence boost anytime by stretching your arms out over your head as if you were doing a jumping jack. Open up your hands and fingers. Repeat this 2 or 3 times and you’ll feel an instant boost of energy and confidence.
Ask for what you want! This is so important, especially for women. Your odds of getting what you want increase dramatically when you ask for what you want. This could be from a friend, spouse, or boss. If the response to your ask is something different than you would like, you’ll have an opportunity to figure out if it’s time to change what you want or change who you’re asking.
Don’t let yourself get bullied.
“-People are bullied because they won’t fight back.” There are many excuses people use for not fighting back against a bully, but none of those excuses is going to move you closer to a fuller, more meaningful, productive life.
Who or what is bullying you now? Make a list of situations you need to stand up to. It could be people – your boss, partner, friend, or parent. But it also might be things you know you need to do, but the fear of doing them keeps you from executing. You may be afraid of something in your past – maybe you need to finish your college degree. Maybe you need to make amends with a family member, maybe your credit rating is a mess – all or any of these things can feel like a bully you’re afraid to face.
Feedback loops
Identify your “feedback loops.” Do your feedback loops have negative outcomes – if so, how can you change them?
Do your feedback loops have positive outcomes? If so, how can you replicate that behavior in other areas of your life?
Do you want more from your life? Remember the optimistic lessons in Price’s Law and the Pareto Distribution – Those who start to have, will probably get more. The more positive outcomes you create the more likely you are to create positive outcomes.
Make a list of both negative and positive outcome feedback loops – how will eliminate the negative outcomes and increase the positive outcomes.
Meaningful quotes from this chapter and discussion.
From the forward, Norman Doidge, “The best rules do not ultimately restrict us, they facilitate our goals and make for fuller, FREER lives.”
Jordan Peterson, “No one standing still can triumph, no matter how well constituted.”
Jordan Peterson, “Put your desires forth as if you had a right to them, at least the same right as others.”
Mark Twain, ” Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll still get run over if you just stand there.”
Life, “Don’t believe everything you think.”
Jordan Peterson, “Sacrifice is necessary to generate a productive and meaningful reality. What are you willing to sacrifice to add meaning to your life?”
Thanks for joining us for this video/podcast.
Tiffany & London
You can download the worksheet for Rule #1 – Stand up straight with your shoulders back – here.
